Happy Home > HAPPY HOME

Happy Home (H2)

Objective : Activity:
Home filled with happiness Positive Human Relations

Introduction: Home Exnora Yoga includes Happy Home. Without a good relationship between family members, how will cleanliness through Home Exnora bring happiness?

Happy Home is a magical concept. By using this concept, the whole family can live happily despite the so called external and internal problems. If all the concepts like Principled Simplicity are practised even partially, every one in the family is bound to be happy, at least not unhappy. The concept of “Happy Home” aims at creating the right atmosphere for the members of the family for making certain mental adjustments and to realise happiness. The members of families who want to realise a “Happy Home” can straight away adopt certain behavioural patterns and attitude recommended here. If the members in a family want more input in this matter, they can do so via email. Here is a small introduction to the concept. Those who join will be initiated to the whole idea. The family members, who agree to subscribe to this concept, will adhere to a family Code of Conduct. Those who are interested can form Happy Home chapters in their town, periodically meet, share the Happy Home experience (also through Internet), come up with their own methodologies and help in creating thousands of Happy Homes. Those families having alcoholics can ask Exnora for 100 simple tips to change them. They are welcome to enquire about Sarva sakhthie; women coming together to change alcoholics, the families of alcoholics coming together (Family of Families) and the alcoholics themselves coming together under “We for ourselves” all aiming for alcoholics to give up alcohol.

Net worth approach:

If someone in the family has done something unacceptable, the other members must take into consideration the person’s good qualities and previous contributions before passing judgement on that person. To put it in the accounting parlance, the others mentally prepare, a ‘human qualities balance sheet’ of the wrong doer. The particular questionable act of that family member is mentally posted on the liability side. His positive contributions and good deeds are posted on the asset side of his balance sheet, and his ‘qualities net worth’ is arrived at. In other words, this exercise will enable others to recall and remember his ‘asset qualities’ which in turn will reduce their mental anguish and anger towards him for his particular ‘liability quality’ (or a wrong act). In short he is seen in totality. By this exercise people don’t develop any prejudice from a single act of misbehaviour / misconduct / omission / commission of a member of family (even outsider). Seeing the positive side of a person, when he or she commits a wrong deed will help others to be calm. It will also serve to prevent possible conflicts. Heaven will dawn on Home.

“Today, when world peace is threatened with atomic and nuclear weapons capable of annihilating the human race, Mahatma Gandhi's teachings of love and truth and of respect for others' rights have become even more meaningful than at any other time.” - Haile Selassie

While reading about Gandhi, King began to realize what Jesus of Nazareth had meant when he said: "Show your enemies that you love them! Ask God to love those who would persecute you!"

Capsule Counselling :

Even when it comes to the question of pointing out a lapse / commission / omission / negative contribution made by a member of family, a particular methodology is employed to point out the wrong. First, he is generously appreciated for all his past positive contributions and achievements. Then gently his particular negative contribution is brought to his notice. Finally he is comforted to over come his feeling of guilt. It is nothing but sandwiching criticism with praise. This will lead to his taking the message without offence. It is called capsule counselling because the bitter medicine (criticism) is put inside the sugar quoted capsule (appreciation) as bitterness is not liked by any one.

Net Worth Approach (Reverse) by erring person :

The person who has committed a mistake and earned the displeasure of other family members can also use this technique. He can pacify them by pointing out to them his good qualities and past positive contributions.

Different strokes :

Assuming a person has one good quality and all bad qualities, start praising him for that one good quality he has. It will be an incredible experience to observe all his bad qualities disappear one by one, over a period of time. On the contrary, if a person has all good qualities and only one negative quality, one should not criticise that negative quality. This will have an opposite effect. The good qualities can also be appreciated in the presence of others.

Empathy :

Assuming a person has one good quality and all bad qualities, start praising him for that one good quality he has. It will be an incredible experience to observe all his bad qualities disappear one by one, over a period of time. On the contrary, if a person has all good qualities and only one negative quality, one should not criticise that negative quality. This will have an opposite effect. The good qualities can also be appreciated in the presence of others.

Inverse Empathy:

We introduce “Inverse Empathy”, our novel and innovative concept. Not only a member of the family sees from the view point of another family member but he also then enables the other family member to look from his (the formers’) view point. In other words, he will provide the justification for his conduct. It is a two way approach. If both “Empathy” and “Inverse Empathy” are practised, no home will have any conflict.

Improvism :

We always talk about optimism and pessimism. Optimism is considered as very good and pessimism is considered to be very bad. Ironically we have come across people are very optimistic, but are crashing. We now introduce a new concept “Improvism” which is something very practical, lies in between optimism and pessimism. It is nothing but cautious optimism. The improvements are achieved in instalments and stages. There is no fall. Even when it is there, it does not injure. We will call the one who practises improvism as an improvist. Ask for details and booklet.

Family designations:

The conventional, routine, unattractive, negative and formal designations within the family should be done away with. A girl who lives with her parents for about 25 years joins the family of her in-laws and lives there for rest of her life, say, next 60 years. Why should we have formal names (designations) like Father-in-law, Mother-in-law, Daughter-in-law and Son-in-law? Why can’t they be known as Lovely Daughter, Lovely Mother etc. The word Law is not only formal but it often and eventually leads to legal battles. Love should flourish between strangers who are going to live together for many years, building a new relationship. Positivism and optimism act in the sub-conscious mind and bring wonderful results. Words have power.

That is why we do not call a nation “underdeveloped” but “developing”. Similarly, instead of calling a community as ‘backward’ why don’t we call it a ‘progressing community’. This change in the name is sure to create mental vibrations and tune the minds of the people towards progress. Tit Bit: How nice it will be to say “Heaveno” instead of “Hello”. For more details on the exciting and useful concept of Happy Home, please contact Exnora International.

Mutual Recognition :

Family members will develop the habit of appreciating others. There will be group clapping and group patting when one of the family members does some thing extraordinary or when one has to be encouraged. Different methods will be devised to make the appreciation known. Here is one. Make, one 1’ X 1’ velvet pasted wooden board. Name it as “Appreciation Board” and fix it one the living room wall. On the birthday of a family member, each of other family members will write on a piece of paper the name of birthday family member followed by a statement, “I like you for your……………..” (a particular good quality of his) and pin it on the board. When every one does, it will indeed be an excellent birthday gift. He will be happy to know his good qualities and will decide to improve them further. At the same time, it will encourage others to emulate him, with regard to those qualities. Similarly, when a family member makes an achievement, all others will together write “We appreciate you for your achievement”. They will sign and put it on the Appreciation Board.

Ownership :

Not only will each member be given the “Ownership of a Task” but “Ownership of Achievement” too, preferably in the presence of others.

Home Mediation :

When there is a dispute or likelihood a dispute between two members of family, another member will play the role of a mediator. He will help in building a good relationship between the two, by pointing out:

  • the good of one to another and vice versa and
  • the esteem and respect one has on another and vice versa

Situational Motivation:

In the one day course “Motivate and Move Mountains” conducted by MOTIVISION, a training division of Exnora, twenty motivation techniques are taught. “Shifting the motive” and “Situational Motivation” are taught. The twenty motivation tools can be used easily and effortlessly according to the situation and the person involved and it will bring the desired results. Ask for details.

Exchange positive thoughts, constructive deeds and your Happy Home experience through Internet. Inform us to.

Sustained Motivation through three Environment

* Source M B Nirmal’s Training Programmes & Books by name Motiva‘c’tion
(All About Motivation), 7th Sense, Effective Parenting.

1. Natural Environment
No explanation is needed. Be guided by the recommendations made in the Green Home Chapter. It has been found that the green surroundings help in many regards including conflict reduction and people becoming calm and peaceful.

2. Physical or Senses Environment
The house can be small. What matters is how neatly you keep it. You must make sure your house is not congested. Arrangements and positioning of things including furniture, Fixtures, Domestic Appliances, Wall Decorations etc, should be done taking into account not only convenience but elegance too. There should be some thing to stimulate your six senses. Visual, Auditory, Kinaesthetic, Olfactory, Gustatory & Thinking.

3. Behavioural Environment
This whole chapter deals about Behavioural Environment. Ask for more details.

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